I ain't even got to the donkey, yet; I hit page 2 and this dude is screaming about the tragedy of being a reasonable human, instead of the judgemental shit-bag that he was before having life experiences.
And he's blaming his possible maturity on eating magic beans?
I mean... I get that he's 17, and I remember that age being populated with dumb turds, but... what the fuck, dude?
"Oh NOES! I have started to act like a person who might get laid, someday!"
- no actual human, ever
[EDIT: got to the donkey; definitely gonna evolve to 3rd waifu. Gods have mercy.]