@Adisx1 You know, a lot of those r*pe fantasies you’re referring to start off with a woman being sexually harassed and assaulted, and suddenly halfway during the act and afterward, she “likes it.” This is actually the exact same trope. Stories like this that are supposed to be sexy and romantic and stories that are more explicit put their female protagonists into situations where they are assaulted, and excuse it after the fact by saying that the woman wanted it. Even if he apologizes, it doesn’t matter, because she “wants it.”
I have had actual conversations with people about real life situations like this, where I was told verbatim “It’s not r*pe If she likes it,” and they did not believe real women who went through things like this and who later came forward with r*pe allegations. It’s not two consenting adults because she (eventually) reluctantly says okay to a powerful man who is more famous than her, who has more money and status in her company than her, who she has idolized for a long time, and who refuses to listen to her when she says no. This scenario is a lot more like situations described by the MeToo movement. If she refuses, she has a whole lot to lose. That’s why this is coercion.
I put myself in her shoes and think about what I would do. It’s nice to have somebody appreciate my flaws. I’d prefer if they didn’t drag me into locked closets all the time and grope me while they did it. My agenda as you call it, is to not act like these stories are cute and normal. It doesn’t fix everything, but if I went through something like this and told my company that I did not like this and I want it to stop, it would be nice to not be told that this is romantic, or be bullied or fired for telling the truth about a powerful man. It would be nice to not be traumatized and have people tell me that I wanted it.
That’s it. That’s my essay.
