The Dangers in My Heart - Vol. 4 Ch. 48 - We Walked Slowly

[fucknvampire]

Some lewd hand holding right there.

 

[Sodomephius]

OK, I will point this out specifically: consciously holding hands is the line. It's actually kind of crazy what happened here, it reminds me so much of real life late teen-young adult romance, it's almost uncanny, in a good way. You don't get this in manga. Sasuga, Sakurai-sensei.

I mean, I probably have told so many times already, but there's something about this work that's simply dazzling. It's something very fine, almost transparent blue. Maybe it's just me, but the relationship (aside from the completely unnatural and misplaced random sexualization of Yamada, and trust me, I'm all OK with her age) seems really natural in IRL way.

This is how it happens in the real life, and—surprise!—in Japan too: you do things instead of saying things. You're always playing it safe while trotting deep in the danger zone, as if holding the rope to get you back to a safe distance. For example, you don't take people for "dates." Gosh, that's so bookish.

You "go hang out." It's just the two of you. You don't explicitly point out this part, but both of you get it.

Your "hanging out" is going to the local park, shopping mall, cafe or a cinema. You don't specifically discuss it, not in a conscious way. You always pretend like everything is random.
At some point you take another's hand. You check. You always do. No words, only careful body language, only scrupulous analysis of one's face behind an innocent smile. Always careful, always making sure you have as much possible escape opportunity as you can. With experience, you can even go as far as sleeping with people while still retaining escape routes if you ever feel like things went south.

"What do you mean? We just had sex, we didn't mean it in that way, come on!"

Always afraid. Always acting like you're a sapper on a mine field. And the more you want something, the more cautious you're about it, as if taking care not to scare a wild bird.

That's how IRL relationships are. The thought of traditional "confessing" is borderline ridiculous for an adult person. If anything, it usually comes after sex—the only thing that actually really means that you're in a genuine relationship. I would specifically underscore this: sex is the beginning of relationship. Before this, it's all flirting, playing. Heck, even after this it all can so easily disappear.

Anyway, weebs, sorry for this arbitrary attempt at lyricism, what I basically mean is that the author is, probably, a keen woman that had some real mature relationships in her life.
Romance manga—that is not a gross unrealistic yaoi or even shounen ai—is usually written by somewhat young adult males that have little actual IRL romantic experience and not much interest in its psychology. They, indeed, create beautiful stories that a lot of different people find very satisfying, but they are just that: fantasies.
On the other hand, sometimes people that have both the real life experience and at least some basic understanding of psychology (women in most cases treat love affairs much more serious than men, hence my pointing out that the author is a woman) make romance works. In isn't that rare in traditional literature like novel writing, but in manga, it is quite-quite rare.

That's actually the thing about this manga. It's as simple as that: someone took a mature relationship progress and staged it with teens as actors. That's what's captivating about it: we, as adult readers, can't help but unconsciously think about how our lives could've been if we had a 'mature' relationship back then. Of course, we couldn't have: after all, we really were just stupid kids. But, as they say, a man can dream.

And who would be the best to create a man's dream, if not a smart adult woman. Cheers, and thanks for the read.

Sakurai Norio-sensei^

I hate you.

 

[custynee]

The dangers in my heart? More like the dangers in "my" heart.

So wholesome, so cute, why do this

 

[MKA2401]

LEZZZ GOOOO

 

[ChickenMan_I]

O. I die, thank you, forever.

 

[DeOtherOne]

My favorite part is how Yamada picked on how Ichikawa refers to himself. She knows that if he uses "boku", then he must be being honest and showing his true feelings.

 

[Blergggg]

Ah that first hand hold, not wanting to let go but not wanting to say anything to ruin it. Brings me back a little too long ago lol

 

[andrybak]

"Everyone catches his eye. Make him only look at you."

I tried to google and duckduckgo this phrase, but nothing came up. So this isn't a quote, it's an original 🙃

 

[andrybak]

This is how it happens in the real life, and—surprise!—in Japan too: you do things instead of saying things. You're always playing it safe while trotting deep in the danger zone, as if holding the rope to get you back to a safe distance.
[...]
At some point you take another's hand. You check. You always do. No words, only careful body language, only scrupulous analysis of one's face behind an innocent smile. Always careful, always making sure you have as much possible escape opportunity as you can.

I can't say anything about the dating scene in Japan, but in the Western culture, this is what flirting is. It's a safe method of gauging romantic and/or sexual interest in a way, which leaves room for a very polite, subtext rejection. Such a refusal to participate in mutual flirting doesn't hurt egos of participants and doesn't hurt their prior relationship, if any. Flirting must be very light, because increasing the intensity can unintentionally slide into something awkward at best and sexual harassment at worst.

The problem is that flirting is by definition ambiguous. And this ambiguity is extremely hard to navigate. There are studies that show that people are very very bad at detecting when someone is flirting with them.

While the pairs were more than 80 percent accurate in knowing when their counterpart was not flirting, they were far less accurate in detecting when they were being flirted with. Only 36 percent of men judged correctly, and for women, the number was 18 percent.

“Behavior that is flirtatious is hard to see, and there are several reason for that,” Hall said. “People aren’t going to do it in obvious ways because they don’t want to be embarrassed, flirting looks a lot like being friendly, and we are not accustomed to having our flirting validated so we can get better at seeing it.”