Do men just hate for us women to be independent and take care of ourselves?? What's his problem...
He doesn't hate her being independent, but when you're in a relationship neither of you are trully independent, you should rely on each other and think of each other. They both have a point, she lacks security due to the nature of his work and his actions, he feels like she priorities her work over him every time, she has a right to feel Finincially secure in a relationship, and he has a right to feel emotionally secure and spend time with his partner, the problem is that they didn't take about it until now.
On a side note, needlessly spending a lot less time with your loved ones in favor work (with the girl is going here) isn't seeking independence, it's overworking yourself and being neglectful towards your loved ones.