The Numbers - Oneshot

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@kernyang lying doesnt mean a person is bad, yes
but when you're lying on a daily basis without blinking an eye, especially like how the girl plays a saint and carefreely lies on the spot, you're likely not too far from being despicable either
 
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If the numbers are tracking lies the fact that MC has 0 is a laughable fantasy. If it's tracking lies starting after the numbers appeared it's somewhat more believable I guess. But if it's tracking lies then there's a 0% chance anyone would mistake the numbers for "charm points" since it would be so easy to pin down exactly what is making the counter tick up.

I don't find this fictitious scenario very believable is what I'm trying to say here.
 
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Plot twist, it's actually the number of people interested in you and mc just confirmed to her that she can try getting him 😏
 
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If nobody said i guess i would take a while to me get the lie thinh. I would keep in "oh he just got a little charming?"
 
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Two pages in and the number is obviously the number of lies they tell. "Zero lies" is nonsense, but it's more or less a fact that popular people lie more.
Hah, guess I was almost at the end. Now that's one short fucking story.
 
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Lol, she clearly knew what the number was, and probably thought him an eyesore for actually having a real 0. Would explain her intentionally approaching him to force him to lie. ...Now I wonder how infuriated she is in the guy having so little integrity it took her less than a minute, despite managing to have had a zero.

Also, that burn she planned too, lying by saying he is charming, directly before making him realize what the number is. It all shows she clearly knew he loved her, and most likely lacked the spine to admit it when confronted.

@sinkingship I think it is pretty obvious it is tracking after. Otherwise everyone would be 3 digit simply on account of unintended lies, like saying they know something when they only think they do. And even if those arent counted, then so many being around 10-20 seems way too unlikely
 
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hmmm.

Art: 8
Plot: 2.5
Execution:10

I honestly don't know what made you guys comment so much about this work, but this was very well done in terms of execution.
 
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It's impossible that you could tell that few lies by the time you are in high school. Kids lie all the time, especially if white lies count, or little lies like not having a crush.

Even 800 is low.
 
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This would actually be a strong opening to a story, at least towards the mystery of why the numbers appeared, why they only track the people of that class, and when the counting actually began. Having spoken only a single-digit number of lies is almost laughable in that society.

As is, the mystery just... lingers there.

By the way, lies can be said for any reason, even good ones, perhaps especially good ones. Would POWs rather die than speak a lie? The moment means everything.
 
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@Varler "It's impossible that you could tell that few lies by the time you are in high school. Kids lie all the time, especially if white lies count, or little lies like not having a crush. Even 800 is low."

Don't forget, it mentions that the numbers suddenly appeared over everyone's head which can also imply that the number counter started at that time (with him lacking a social presence, meant he also lacked interaction) because the score could change and it seems like it changed in one way... upwards.
 
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I swear I read a one shot before where also numbers appeared, but it was connected to the times of masturbation or sex they had.
 
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Note how many possible lies Aikawa could've spoken (while keeping in mind that this is an English translation of Japanese statements, so who knows which ones the author intended to actually be the lies):

>Score: 797
>Ah, [I'm] sorry if I startled you
>It's just [that] you weren't looking well, so I was worried
>Score: 798 (either she's not sorry about startling him, or she wasn't worried about him not looking well)
>They're just some dumb numbers
>Score: 799 (her lie here says she believes otherwise, so she seems to have already figured it out)
>A person's worth isn't measured by numbers!
>I think you have plenty of charm anyways!
>Score: 800 (either she does believe a person's worth is measured by numbers, or she doesn't think he has "plenty of charm")
>I'm not super convinced just yet that everyone has the right idea about what the numbers mean
>Score: 800
 
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@sinkingship
Rather than "charm points", they could mistake it for the number of people attracted or some other things. Those are students we're talking about, you can excuse them for not thinking too much into it.
 

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