The Woman Who Messes With My Emotions (2022) - Ch. 20

[Jexzer]

4 months for another cliff hanger

 

[Ninoren]

This chapter made me really mad at this asshole, she is doing all the heavy lifting for him and this idiot still finds ways of pushing her away. Like I get being insecure, but even if you are you should realize that if a girl is lying in bed almost naked with you, she doesn't have a problem with your virginity and even finds it cute then maybe just maybe she is interested in you and whatever history she might have and whatever she might be thinking at the moment it's completely irrelevant to the fact that she is in bed with you about to do it.

At this point the manga kind of broke my immersion by making her, even after how badly he treated her, to STILL be interested on this loser, to the point I am wondering if the "you never forget your first" is actually a hint that she knows him from before and might have had a crush on him for a long time.



I don't agree with the second part, she said that you don't forget your first time because that's exactly what happens, you really don't. She isn't responsible of him being an insecure loser and really shouldn't have to be second guessing everything she says just because this asshole might take it the wrong way.

I mean, considering this chapter its possible she's that interested in him exactly for that fact, him being the "insecure loser", who hadn't had any experience yet 😶

Maybe that's just her usual game, would certainly explain her creepy vibe so far

 

[Niviik]

Her non-verbal communication can not be clearer

The problem is that her verbal communication has been blurred from the beginning with several "Just joking" or "Take it as practice for when you'll have an actual date." MC has a serious inferiority complex so he doesn't let himself believe that she's actually serious about them, and she's not doing a good job at saying clearly that she is.

She understood she was too pushy and decided to stop her advances on him but she ran away from the serious conversation by facing away and just saying good night. Then, the next day, she leaves before he wakes up. Of course MC is going to think that she's disappointed in him when he'll see that she left without a word. Here again, there is no proper communication.

Next chapter will be interesting. MC has woken up, so he will either stay inside his home whining about how he messed things up (I hope it's not what happens), or he will go out trying to look for her and the three characters will actually have to talk to each other.

 

[JaceG13]

Because she saw how nervous he was and wanted him to know that she won't be disappointed. Then, when she realizes how it actually affected him, she pulls back because she doesn't want to force him. Then when she leaves in the morning, she kisses him on the cheek and whispers into his ear "see you," saying to him that hey, I understand that this may have been too much but I want to see you again. Confirming through her act of affection that she's not disappointed in him.

Like she's... fucking doing everything right here, these past two chapters are frustrating beyond belief. Azuha isn't messing with anyone's emotions. She's gentle, inviting, reassuring and even pulls back when she's sure she took it too far and making sure to communicate that she still wants to see him. This, WHILE she knows that he was talking to someone else and threw that woman out of his room with a lie, clearly not confident enough to even say that the two of them were in a relationship. Nor confident enough to tell Azuha that someone else was there.

You know what. That's fair, I didn't consider this from her POV. I was hyper-focused on her wording and ignored the inherent bias added from seeing through the MC's POV.

EDIT: I will say though, that whatever is going on in her head, is being lost in translation when it comes out her mouth. She said the wrong words and the wrong time that shifts the relationship dynamics by making everything she does suspicious. "Does she like me or does she just want my virginity?"-kinda thing. Her body language might be encouraging and affectionate, but are her feelings behind it legit? He would've struggled to gauge that before (due to his insecurity), and it's impossible now without proper dialogue between them.

 

[Drillbyte]

Saying you like taking first times is weird and fetishy no matter how you slice it lmao

 

[Ozone8080]

I wonder if Azusa can defuse the situation before MC either yells out of his window or runs downstairs to say something incredibly stupid

These two already know of each other somewhat (They passed each other outside the building, Amatella watched Azusa go inside of MCs house, and Azusa read Amatella's messages), so maybe she can play it off by pretending to be his sister or something

 

[Jachinz]

I was praying for the fumble on both their parts and the author delivered

 

[LilHoodie]

ew used goods

My dude...

 

[volodyuka]

"people always remember their fist time"? naaah. barely remember mine. was a bit drunk. bit underage. well quite a bit. and had first time with an older girls for whom it was for fun and a favor for my asshole of a step-brother. so was not a good experience, hence I barely remember it. (also age. getting older sucks, many things will be forgotten or turn hazy. even many good memories)

 

[SilentWInd]

She can't get mad at him after basically saying he's just a number on her tally

 

[Blergggg]

So gross when guys need their girls to be 'pure' for them. Sex is a natural thing and you aren't 'damaged goods' as many Manga like to say when the girl isn't a virgin (but they NEVER say that about the guy, curious...)

 

[Dingo777]

Honestly,I liked this. It was a series of very human foibles. His insecurity about his own self worth just happened hit against her indelicate advances in a way that caused very believable friction. What she views as an assurance organically landed in a way that struck a nerve he had exposed, then her attempt to diffuse and give him space realistically came across as disappoint and rejection. It was clumsy in a way I’ve seen happen in real life.

Did she mess up with her wording? Yeah, but that happens. I really can’t fully blame either party.

But like, come on, folks gave him shit for talking about another girl while on a date after she specifically asked and she basically talked about fucking other dudes right before sex (albeit with likely good intentions). Cut them some slack.

This is of course assuming she doesn’t have ulterior motives which I won’t speculate on right now.

 

[themanthemyth]

amatella high key was the best option from the start but god damn if she was undressing on top of you you might as well have gone for the kill man. this chapter was surprisingly great for 19 straight chapters of cringe-inducing insecurity, great climax and a very realistic diffusion of the situation. unfortunately based on what she said she is a whore

 

[orangerain7734]

Because she saw how nervous he was and wanted him to know that she won't be disappointed. Then, when she realizes how it actually affected him, she pulls back because she doesn't want to force him. Then when she leaves in the morning, she kisses him on the cheek and whispers into his ear "see you," saying to him that hey, I understand that this may have been too much but I want to see you again. Confirming through her act of affection that she's not disappointed in him.

Like she's... fucking doing everything right here, these past two chapters are frustrating beyond belief. Azuha isn't messing with anyone's emotions. She's gentle, inviting, reassuring and even pulls back when she's sure she took it too far and making sure to communicate that she still wants to see him. This, WHILE she knows that he was talking to someone else and threw that woman out of his room with a lie, clearly not confident enough to even say that the two of them were in a relationship. Nor confident enough to tell Azuha that someone else was there.


I don't think that's fair to him. It's less "oh no, she's impure," it's "oh no, I'm not going to be anything she remembers." Her words that were meant to re-assure him that she isn't going to dislike having sex with him instead made him retreat into his feelings of inadequacy, which she fucking noticed.

The frustration in this manga isn't that he's a purity obsessed weirdo. No, they wouldn't have had this thing if he was like that. The frustration is that he is deeply, traumatically insecure and he seems to refuse to take Azuha's actions as the gentle and re-assuring things they are, instead being mysterious and inscrutable. It was cute and honestly kind of interesting, because we had a both unlimited but limited perspective; only ever hearing his thoughts in times of anxiety and insecurity. He can talk to this beautiful and affectionate woman about their shared hobbies for hours, but when the prospect of her liking to be around him and wanting to spend more time with him pop up, that's when we're teleported into his horrified and disbelieving head.

But now there's some OTHER girl and its annoying. Azuha doesn't deserve this. She's been so patient and careful and clear in her non-verbal communication that this relationship being denied is deeply frustrating, especially because we've never seen any acknowledgement from him about just how much she's trying to say she likes him and wants to be around him. Cause he can't, yes, cause he doesn't believe it, but god DAMN it man what does she have to DO dude

She's been so patient and careful and clear in her non-verbal communication

I think that's the point. Non-verbal communication doesn't always translate the same in different cultures, and moreover, not a lot of guys can read the subtler signs that girls show they're into him. This also includes reading between the lines and the hidden context of the spoken word, when taken quite literally. For example:

I love doing it with someone who hasn't had their first time yet.

Like GIRL. How do you know what doing it with a virgin is like if you haven't even done it yourself, unless you've done it already?

With someone like her, it wouldn't be surprising if she had a history, but she basically admits it right there as a favorite past time of hers. Azuha might as well be viewing MC as another 'achievement' in her ever increasing body count of virgin cherries she has popped, and he doesn't want to waste his first time with someone like that. That may not be the truth of what she's feeling and her 'history', but that's what the MC's current interpretation of her words in that moment is, and I don't blame him for losing the will to continue.

I get it, we're in a time when many people have had premarital sex at least once in their lives a little earlier than planned. You'd have to go to a church or some religious infrastructure if you want any hope of finding a virgin to marry, but if you're not picky about someone's sexual history, more power to you. We're following MC's path of improving his self-esteem and seeking some form of companionship in a difficult time in his life, not just romantically. Azuha, from what we've seen through her approaches to him so far, has had plenty of experience in 'seeing people'. We've yet to see where her true feelings for him lie, but if there's a chance her interest in a long-term relationship with him is sincere, even if she did have a wide history of men seen before him, she shot herself in the foot with that one line.

If that was supposed to be some form of assurance in something, well, we're certainly assured of something here, alright.

 

[NotSomeone]

She said something weird to him, and he obviously is heavily insecure about himself and his ability to perform, even more when she claims to like taking first times left and right like it's some kind of hobby.
He was scared and he felt pushed against a wall.
No matter how hot the other person is, if you don't feel comfortable doing it you probably should not do it - that's valid for everyone regardless of gender.

I honestly fail to grasp how people are mad at him when it's obvious he's depressed and anxiety ridden and that she's being weird as fuck.

 

[Dipuc4Life]

Choices choices. Your options are between an apparent slut? and a probable psycho? Now the slut may not actually be a slut and the psycho might not be crazy but he might not find out until he sticks his dick in. Either way he's probably getting burned, sad.

 

[Dingo777]

Choices choices. Your options are between an apparent slut? and a probable psycho? Now the slut may not actually be a slut and the psycho might not be crazy but he might not find out until he sticks his dick in. Either way he's probably getting burned, sad.

Honestly this really makes me want to read a manga where the FMC exhibits every flag of being dangerous and like she’s preying on the MC but it never happens

 

[eviljackspicer]

Guy: Why am I so cold?
Me: CUZ YOU HELLA GAY THAT'S WHY

 

[Toon_Jay]

Oh God he is a cringe purity worshiping loser.

Dude... That's NOT why he was upset, lmao... He even outright explained it

 

[Me]

"Do you have a moment... to talk about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?"