i mean i don't get it. so is the author saying that if she wasn't strong, they would all trash her and be rude? never serving her or honoring her marriage with their master?
come on... it makes no sense. even more so in such setting. sure, they wouldn't be receiving orders from her or letting her lead them on some affair (for her safety reasons, and not because of some looking down bs). the minimum decorum is expected!
so if she was weak would they never protect her? even when she is the wife of the one feeding them?
really? are they going around treating everyone else the same way? are they killing the poor and the sick? because they sure are often useless.
also a leader sometimes need to have way more than raw power. you only truly put your neck in the hand of someone who can easily kill you, when you believe they are worth such honor... and that has very little to do with power and much more to do with a few personality.
this seems to be only here so she can act like a surprising newcomer in some mercenary group or school... the plot device is basically that, but the context seem to not fit.
if it was anyone with a strong leading presence, she would have made their lives a pain in the ass... because if they simple want to fight some monster, they can take their weapons and go live in the forest... no need to receive pay, honor, and order from this house.