Apologies if this isn't the right place to talk about this but it is literature. I am about halfway through an old 1936 self-help book 'how to win friends and influence people' and it has changed the way I look at myself and other people. It especially made me conscious of how often I criticize others, even those I love the most. I am finding myself looking inward to why I do this[my rearing], what benefit it gives me[momentary feeling of superiority maybe?] and what benefit it has to others[none. zero.]. "The only way to get someone to do something is to make them want to do it." Sure you can force someone to do something if you have power over them in some way, but that is an illusion and temporary, they have not changed anything and will resent you for it. I have been criticizing and casually belittling my family for things my whole life and it hasn't brought anyone any benefit, just unhappiness and resentment. I am going to start complimenting them for the things I like that they do, instead of always commenting on the things I don't like that they do or I feel they should do differently. I want to start making other people feel smart and important instead of stupid and small. I don't know how to build good relationships with people but I am going to try harder from now on.
Anyone have a similar experience with a book they read?
Anyone have a similar experience with a book they read?