I Think Our Son Is Gay

[idgal]

Square Enix manga just announced a English license for the series

https://twitter.com/squareenixbooks/status/1288866441350066176?s=21

 

[SuperOniichan]

From the chapters I read fluently, his mother is more interested in her female gay fantasies than understanding her son's real sexuality. I could understand if it was a fetishized josei, but it looks rather uncomfortable in this form.

 

[Stoner]

The fact this rates under 8 is a disgusting travesty.

 

[Stoner]

@Somethindarker why does this rub you the wrong way when the mom in this is doing the complete opposite of what you talked about.

 

[Kurbo]

I think this manga is pretty detached from the LGBT movement and is just a story that happens to have a (probably) gay character

 

[LadMan]

Dropped -- the plot doesn't go anywhere

 

[morooster]

there is absolutely nothing wrong with that poor father expecting grandkids

 

[danceicarus]

I feel like reading this is pointless even though it has cute moments because I also get the feeling that he'll never ever tell anyone he's gay.

 

[MXCL]

It's just a slice of life with a probably gay kid. Don't expect any plot or LGBT agendas or anything, just wholesomeness.

 

[Sem]

@SuperOniichan

Isn't Okura, the author, a gay man though?

I don't think the mother is having gay fantasies about her own son. She's just trying to mind her kid's preferences and support him.

 

[SuperOniichan]

@Sem No matter what gender the author is, at least to me it still looks like a straight woman enjoying her fantasies that her son is gay. If it was something like "my daughter is lesbian" instead, then feminists very quickly start calling this creepy.

 

[glub]

@SuperOniichan as a wlw I can confidently say that if the genders were all flipped (i.e. a father thinks his daughter is gay) with the exact same personalities/plot... I'd still enjoy this manga, 100%. I don't think it's fetishizing gayness at all. It's made abundantly clear by the mangaka that MC is, in fact, gay. From my perspective, mother isn't projecting her fantasies onto him at all. She's simply a kind, loving mother who wants the best for her child, and doesn't want him to feel as if he's "freakish" or "unnatural" for liking a boy. Isn't that something to be celebrated, especially when compared to actual fetishizations of gayness that call it "forbidden love" or "sinful?"

If it WAS fetishization, the mother would have ACTUAL fantasies, such as imagining her son kissing a boy, then blushing and thinking to herself "oh my, forbidden love!" or "I'm going to the sinbin, teehee!" But she doesn't do that. Instead, she treats it as any other crush that her child might have, and simply tries to support him in any way that she can without making it clear that she knows he's gay. She treats the situation very delicately and tries to not out him before he's ready to tell his family himself, understanding that doing so would be intrusive, and might make him uncomfortable. She understands that growing up gay in an environment that is sometimes hostile towards homosexuality (e.g. the childhood crush flashback) can be hard, so she does her best to be a constant in his life-- someone he knows he can always trust to love and care for him.

I was rejected by my family for my sexuality, so I find stories like this very cathartic. I'd relate even more to the story if it was "My Daughter is Probably Gay," because it'd parrot my struggles with my sexuality and my family (albeit in a more gentle environment with a loving parent instead), and it wouldn't be creepy at all. If what @Sem mentioned was true (that Okura is a gay man) then this story might be a way for him to recount or rewrite his own experiences growing up gay in a society that views it as odd or weird.

 

[SuperOniichan]

@glub You absolutely do not understand what I mean. I'm not trying to argue about whether he is gay or not. As well as how one should treat homosexuality. I'm only talking about what I find repulsive the story about straight parent enjoying speculation that their child of the opposite sex might be gay. It reminds me of an old satirical yuri manga about a family of yuri authors who fetishize their daughter's lesbian relationship, literally enjoying the fact that their daughter is a lesbian.

 

[glub]

@SuperOniichan The point of my comment was to point out that the mother is not fetishizing her son's crush on another boy. I think it's handled very tastefully? I pointed out that it was made abundantly clear that he's gay, because it's told from her POV -- i.e. she's more or less certain that he's gay from the way he acts around Daigo. Even if she's "enjoying [the] speculation" of her son being gay, it's not in a fetishistic way. She simply enjoys seeing her son happy, and hopes that he'll be able to confess to his crush someday. Like I said-- if it was fetishistic, she'd be having objectifying/fetishistic thoughts about her son. I think the thoughts that she has in the comic are normal for any parent, honestly? Like if Daigo was a girl instead nobody would bat an eye. She's just a mom who's watching her son struggle through a high school crush while silently rooting for him on the sidelines.

If she was truly some sort of degenerate that got off on knowing that her son was gay, instead of an accepting and loving mother, I think Yuuri would be subject to the same sorts of thoughts. Like instead of accepting that Yuuri might not be romantically available for either gender, she'd think "he doesn't like girls because he likes boys, how cute!" But we see that she's not like that. On the contrary, she just realizes that different people can have different orientations, and that's not weird.

 

[SuperOniichan]

@glub You just replace my negative terms with your positive ones. This is an eternal dispute.

 

[Nerderey]

Frankly speaking as someone who is queer myself, I don't consider this work to be fetishistic. In fact it's very thoughtful and heartwarming. I understand why one may have an adverse reaction to the idea of enjoyable speculation though! But considering how far removed from it being a sexually explicit situation (particularly because... this involves the character's son and it isn't an incestuous manga, thank god...), I think that's simply all there is to it. If there was an explicitly sexual element then I might otherwise agree.

Ultimately, to me there's a very clear distinction between this kind of manga trying to depict a supportive mother in a lighthearted way in a very pg-13 context, versus a lot of the overt queerbaiting fetishistic manga out there that's intended more for straight fans to get their rocks off and make a joke out of the queer characters.

 

[Nerderey]

Also spoilers re: the below discussion especially with the recent chapter

Spoiler

I think the latest chapter kind of proves the difference of perspective/approach to a fetishistic interest vs a supportive/simply curious interest in someone's sexuality

 

[comedyxtragedy]

W H O L E S O M E.

This. This right here is content to live for. If I have child (which is idk when), I'll support them regardless of their sexuality. I just want my children to be happy 😭👍

 

[Mngtr]

Surprised that talk of fetishisation even comes up in this series discussion, which is the furthest thing from it that I can imagine. Especially when series like "Kiss Him, Not Me" and other shoujo series are out there, shamelessly guilty of it.

There's a difference between "I think it's really hot if my son is gay" and "I think my son may be gay and I will accept him as he is."

Glad to see more healthy/realistic representation of the LGBTQA+ community in Japan, which tends to be unfriendly to those different. Even addressing how toxic masculinity comments can be said without bad intention, but may still hurt the kid.

Wholesome series

 

[quartersandmortars]

This shit is what I LIVE for.