Kimi ga Shinu Made Koi wo Shitai - Vol. 3 Ch. 14 - I'm Not Afraid Anymore

[anim8tur]

@FindingPurpose She may have thought there really was no hope of surviving and didn’t want to bother Mimi with trying only
to leave her disappointed because she’d fail.

There is of course the more morbid explanation; after seeing how ruthless the war is, she may have just wanted it to end.

 

[Stoner]

So it's just gonna happen dumb like that. Fuck this i'm out.

 

[HauntedPizza]

Edit: I was confused a bit with this comment. My follow up comments clarify more.

 

[anim8tur]

@HauntedPizza I think this was them actually fighting in the war though. Her duel with Mimi was practice so teachers could determine whether or not Seiran was skilled enough to enter the battlefield.

There may have been some time that passed after Seiran got shot and fell from the tree so by the time Seiran got back, everyone may have just been glad to have been done with battle and were too busy tending to their injured friends.

Seiran was the new girl so the only one who she knew there was Mimi and Mimi’s naive so that could explain why Seiran’s injury was overlooked.

Also, it’s my understanding that the war has been going on for quite some time so maybe some of the kids are battle hardened and bit desensitized by it.

I do think this death was necessary because it might be the first time Mimi can remember/wonder what feels like to lose someone she actually cares about.

 

[FIippy]

Why didn't you tell you were hit? I expected something bad will happen but I still hate this.

 

[enigmator]

well this was sorta telegraphed. still hurts

 

[LauraMD211]

@HauntedPizza I believe they were fighting the actual war and not practicing, which would explain the possibility of injury and death.
EDIT: Or, what @enigmator said...lol.
Also, the children ARE expendable because they have no family, which is how and why they were recruited into the school. But I'm in agreement that they should be accompanied by a sensei who has healing magic. Mimi and Furan can't be the only ones who know how to heal people.

 

[anim8tur]

@LauraMD211 I think they were given healing potion in those vials but Seiran gave hers away to save that girl who couldn’t even be bothered to check up on her. Plus, healing magic might be extremely difficult so maybe they want to keep healers off the battlefield because they’re scarce.

 

[HauntedPizza]

@anim8tur Ah for some reason I thought this was still some kind practice, and not like a full out battle that would be unsupervised. I do feel a bit silly that I thought the magic still wouldn't be lethal. I guess you're right that this is an actual battle. Regardless I feel like the battlefield should be better supervised by teachers with healing arts, but I guess the whole point is that they're "disposable child soldiers". Which we've known is the attitude with Mimi for awhile, but since Mimi can't die so that all didn't feel real to me? Plus ultimately I feel like her death is kind of unnecessary and part of the author's pursuit to be grimdark.

@zanonyn as well, just to clarify I was confused in the response I made to you previously, I'll edit that comment now. I'll also say you're very right about shock, but regardless I'm surprised she made no sounds at all, and there was no supervisor to oversee them. Especially strange to see no teacher helping someone still so new to everything like her. Plus nobody noticing all of her bleeding. It felt very unsatisfying and frustrating to me personally, but it's fine if we don't agree.

 

[HauntedPizza]

@LauraMD211 @anim8tur Sorry for the double comment here. I think for me at least, the lack of healing arts and what not just feels like an excuse for the author to easily kill off a bunch of the cast.

 

[anim8tur]

@HauntedPizza I understand why you’d think that but for me, it’s easier to teach someone how to fire a gun to shoot someone but people go through years of medical school to learn how to heal.

But the way this war has been going on, maybe they were more focused on churning out soldiers and not healers.

Seems like they teach basic healing though. Maybe they should try to figure out if someone has an affinity for healing magic and try to hone in on that so they can have more healers.

Then again, since the students are expendable, maybe they save healers for high ranking officials and orphans only get potions.

 

[HauntedPizza]

@anim8tur I think it seems weird when it's not practical for the long term? Generally speaking healing and recovering your troops will lead to better morale, plus your troops last longer. Is this a world where they can just afford to have children dying by the handful on a regular basis? For me also I'm not a fan of stories that make a point of going "war is hard and cruel", by making it as hard and cruel as the author possibly can. That's my personal distaste for stories that try to make a point via being as grimdark as possible.

 

[anim8tur]

@HauntedPizza Children are orphans in a country that’s been at war for years so they might have a bunch of kids whose parents just either die or give them away since they can’t afford to eat/feed them.

I’m seeing it as Seiran’s death being a catalyst for Mimi’s growth. Author can’t kill the person closest to Mimi (not yet anyway) so they kill someone in their circle to help Mimi and Shiina’s relationship deepen. I mean, the way Mimi is, she clearly needs the boost.

She’s had a childlike approach to war. Since she can’t die and there was no one important to her, it’s been a game of sorts. Now, she has someone to lose and is seeing what loss does first hand, I have a feeling it is going to strengthen her connection with Shiina.

 

[HauntedPizza]

@anim8tur That sounds very possible, though I wonder if Mimi is capable of growth. She seems completely detached from the concept of death. Even still, this kind of adds to me feeling like Seiran's death is a bit forced, if she's just fodder for the possible growth of Mimi's character. I'm going to cling to the naïve hope that Mimi finds happiness at the end of this, somehow against all odds.

Edit: Also I mean they're gonna run out of orphans pretty quickly if they just let them die regularly.

 

[ModernLamp]

bitch what

 

[gamma2015]

FFS ITS STILL 10 AM HERE
too early to cry my eyes out

 

[anim8tur]

@HauntedPizza I guess it doesn’t feel forced because I was expecting her death.

For me, Seiran’s character was developed enough that even her death alone is impactful, aside from whatever plot progression she gave Mimi and Shiina’s story line.

Seiran wanted to protect the love of her life. But the things we want sometimes don’t coincide with what the universe plans for us.

Well, orphans might not be their only soldiers though. They could just be first line of defense, like who they send to test weaknesses and stuff, and they have adult soldiers who actually get paid and have more experience.

What would suck though is if this war is strictly being fought by kids, like even the people they’re battling are also just orphans, and the adults are just watching from their podiums letting children die to decrease unexpected population....

 

[HauntedPizza]

@anim8tur I think that's part of why I felt the death was forced, her death was so telegraphed by all the usual red flags before this newest chapter. So it felt like she was set up to die, and the author went through all the usual notions of pointing out how hard her childhood was, how she wants to live a happy life with her love, all the usual things that happen right before a character dies. It's fine that we don't agree, I just feel frustrated myself.

Also yeah it would suck if their entire war is fought by child soldiers. I think for me as well I feel frustrated because so far this entire war feels pointless, and there's no clear goal. So the war right now feels like a prop being used to kill off characters.

 

[anim8tur]

@HauntedPizza I think that whole fighting to walk to her lover on the brink of death without telling anyone she was dying is what I find forced. I know I’ve given my interpretation because on an intellectual level, I get what the author might be trying to do, but perhaps it could have been conveyed differently to achieve the same dramatic results.

Maybe that’s a point of the story though? War, overall, is pointless because people will keep finding things to fight about and there will be bystanders that get dragged and hurt in the process.

This whole scenario just reminds me of In This Corner Of The World....

 

[HauntedPizza]

@anim8tur That's part of what I was trying to say before I think, where I'm not a fan of stories where the point of it is just X thing is bad and horrible, in this case X thing is War, so the author makes a point of forcing everything to be super grimdark to reinforce their message. In situations like this the message is kind of muddied by wonky writing. Also yeah it's shades of "In This Corner Of The World", which I had a few problems with as well in all honesty.