Watashi wo Tabetai, Hitodenashi - Ch. 54 - The Outer Sides That Never Intersect

[fallrain]

Interesting to me that Azami has used her immortality--over centuries of time, it would seem--solely to hunt down Shiori.
Maybe she actually has lived a long life, done all manner of things, and now this is the pursuit that fills her time. Perhaps she believes that killing Shiori will undo the curse? Or this is simply revenge for being forced to live far beyond the span of humanity.

Shiori states that Azami is more dangerous than all the other monsters that have come for Hinako, and I am inclined to agree; immortality seems alluring, but many, many stories involving gaining such a quality result in the person who obtains it going insane at the realization that it means watching everyone you care about die, and everything you cherish slowly rot and decay and erode away by the winds of time. Having it forced upon you unasked would be that much worse, I expect.

So it makes sense that Azami would seek some form of vengeance. Whether it does anything about her condition, there's a lot of "humanness" behind the simple desire to enact reciprocity upon the one who harms you.
Beyond that - I think Hinako is being set up as Azami's foil, both as humans associated with Shiori, but also for Shiori herself.
Shiori calls Azami her enemy, whom she will never see eye-to-eye with. Meanwhile, she pledges to protect Hinako, whatever the cost. Two almost diametrically-opposed stances toward two humans that share her blood, and one representing the "Monster" in Shiori, and the other the "Savior".

Just a lot of fun mirroring of concepts and elements among the characters. This is all rather fragmented on my part, but they're just the things that jumped to mind upon finishing this installment.


Thanks for the TL. Can't wait for the next.

Immortality is quite hard to reason about for us mortals... It's hard for me to think that if you come from time that people are starving and nowadays hunger is much less a global problem and we are heading to eliminate it, you still believe that the world is a hell of a place and want to die. Yeah a lot of thing will rot and decay over time but a lot of new interesting things will emerge, like this manga series. Watching everyone you care about die sucks for sure but so will you watch all your enemies die, well unless your enemy is also immortal I guess.

 

[UdenEmpati]

Immortality is quite hard to reason about for us mortals... It's hard for me to think that if you come from time that people are starving and nowadays hunger is much less a global problem and we are heading to eliminate it, you still believe that the world is a hell of a place and want to die. Yeah a lot of thing will rot and decay over time but a lot of new interesting things will emerge, like this manga series. Watching everyone you care about die sucks for sure but so will you watch all your enemies die, well unless your enemy is also immortal I guess.

my comment was less me drawing from my own musings, and more from actual stories and novels and the like that deal with the concept of immortality and how it, quite often, morphs from a boon into a curse for the one who obtains it.
That is the perspective from which I was ruminating, because this itself is a story, and thus the parallel of fiction with traces of philosophy were my through-line.

I'd go further though, and say that it is impossible to comprehend what "immortality" means from the perspective of someone who will eventually die. It's the difference between a truly grasping the difference between a million of something and a trillion of something.
I don't think a person alive today could imagine what it would be like to live to be 500 years old, for example. Being around from the 1500s to today, even with what we can read about in history texts, represents such a swath of time and paradigm shifts for humanity on every axis you could think to measure, that personally experiencing it defies imagination. We could talk all day about the potential, but that's like saying "I've seen a picture of Saturn" and being able to float among the icy parts of its rings.
It's a question of philosophy and metaphysics and the abstract, rather than something concrete and visceral, in my book.

 

[raineight]

A lot of fiction about immortality is sour grapes and cope, IMO. "Death is natural, immortality a curse" coming from people who don't have a choice in the matter. Which may be psychologically healthy for us mortal people, but not necessarily at all accurate to being immortal.

And of course there are various kinds of immortality, like "eternal youth but killable" or "regenerates from being atomized", for 2 of many variations.

 

[Aggapuffin]

I really hope the future chapters delve into the differences between Hinako and Azami, because they mirror each other very well. While they were both given something they didn't want in the end, with Azami becoming immortal and Hianko living an accident that would've killed her and let her be with her family, they responded very differently in the end. Azami hates Shiori and wants to kill her no matter what, while Hinako, while hating Shiori for a time, managed to grow past it.

I think the funny part is that, you might think it's because the suicidal person (Azami) can't die but the suicidal person (Hinako) can die is the main reason, but... I don't think it is. It's part of it for sure, but there's a bigger difference between the situations of Azami and Hinako. I think the main difference between the two is actually my goat and the best character in the entire series, Miko. Miko is the reason that Shiori mended her bond with Hinako in the first place. Without her doing that, Hinako probably only values Shiori for the fact she'll kill her and she honestly probably would hate her.

Also, unrelated to the rest of this, I'm curious if the conversation between Hinako and Shiori is just a throwaway conversation meant to illustrate these differences between Hinako and Azami or if it's a Chekhov's gun and is foreshadowing that Hinako will end up potentially being forced to eat Shiori's flesh. Especially with how much Shiori is talking about protecting Hinako no matter what, I wouldn't be surprised. I also mentioned this previously in the comments of another chapter, but Hinako eating Shiori's flesh is a very interesting subversion on the title, especially since Hinako called herself the monster in a previous chapter.

Just really interested to see how this all plays out and excited for the next chapter!!

 

[Aggapuffin]

A lot of fiction about immortality is sour grapes and cope, IMO. "Death is natural, immortality a curse" coming from people who don't have a choice in the matter. Which may be psychologically healthy for us mortal people, but not necessarily at all accurate to being immortal.

And of course there are various kinds of immortality, like "eternal youth but killable" or "regenerates from being atomized", for 2 of many variations.

I mean, part of it I 100% get. Especially if you're the only one who is immortal, having to watch everybody you get attached to die would really suck.

Though I've always been on the side of immortality being at the very least neutral, if not beneficial, ever since I wiki surfed on the Jojo Fandom wiki a few years back.

Spoiler: Battle Tendency

When they "killed" Cars by just blasting him into space and he just stopped thinking, I just kind of realized that, if you became immortal and you realized you wanted to die, you could just also do that. Yeah, it'd suck, but there's honestly probably still worse ways to die that you can experience just by getting unlucky. Being given the choice of when is worth it in my eyes.

Of course, there's also the other things like "Oh, you could get tortured forever!!" or something like that, but you can probably just mentally clock out after a while. Or just bunker down and outlive everyone torturing you. And that's ignoring the fact that, with infinitely more time than anyone else on the planet, it's probably pretty damn easy to become the most powerful and influential person in the world.

 

[Tyran272]

would it not be extremely easy to just put her in a metal weighted container and drop it into the deepest part of the ocean never deal with her again.. idk this feels like such a manufactured problem that makes 0 sense in any capacity.

Metal inevitably rusts and breaks. It would work for a century or two.

The funny thing about being truly immortal is that nothing else last forever (and it gets into some real nightmare fuel if you consider that planets, stars and even the universe will eventually die).

 

[Carcer]

Just encase Azami's feet in concrete and dump her in the middle of the ocean. Problem solved.

 

[alfirizkyr]

Azami and Hinako being parallels and mirrors to each other with Shiori as a lynchpin is making me feel things. Lowkey tragic how Hinako could've been Azami at any part in her story, or how Azami could've turned out like Hinako had things gone differently.

It's like everything is all or nothing when it comes to Shiori. It's not like she didn't understand nuances, it's just that every nuance ends up being so sharply polarized in her proximity.

 

[Colonel-Picquart]

Shiori and Miko assume that the point of Azami's plan is to hurt Hinako. I am more worried that this is a longer term plan that has focused on some way of permanently doing to Shiori what a landmine could not.

 

[dazedaze1111]

The difference-maker here is Miko. Miko was the one who pushed Shiori and Hinako to communicate properly, which is why their relationship improved. But with Azami, well... there's no Miko between her and Shiori. Now we'll have to see if Hinako can step up as the mediator for them.

Also, Shiori's love language is definitely physical touch does she? She really likes to caress Hinako's cheek or grab her hand.

Now another month of waiting

 

[beThereShortly]

Thank you so much for the chapter!

 

[DexTimeLord]

What are the odds that Azami is the reason Hinako lost family?

The flashback looked like their first encounter, Azami checked Hinako blood and just then confirmed that she was affected by Shiori, and it's clear it happened after Hinako family death

 

[Gothic_Catalyst]

Thank you for the chapter.

 

[erana1]

Just encase Azami's feet in concrete and dump her in the middle of the ocean. Problem solved.

Devour and diggest her. Works as "death-proof-proof" in about every setting, including traditional Japanese mythos about yokai. Quoting Dungeon Meshi, "shit doesn't revive"

 

[SmellyOjisan]

Does anyone think there may have been more to Shiori and Azami past than Shiori is letting on or explaining? They only lived together for short while relative to Azami's perception of it but they could have shared a romance possibly. My reasoning is the whole "turning her immortal against her will" can't be the only motive Azami has for going this long vehemently hunting Shiori right? Hopefully Azami will get her side of the story in a flashback eventually or I could be totally wrong and it was that simple but every panel we see Azami mentioned with Shiori present she seems almost melancholy like.

 

[Masontheanimefan123]

would it not be extremely easy to just put her in a metal weighted container and drop it into the deepest part of the ocean never deal with her again.. idk this feels like such a manufactured problem that makes 0 sense in any capacity.

Well she’s immortal spending a couple hundred years underwater and breaking the chain is nothing

 

[Saon]

nonzero, but I hope it's not the case.

Turns out I missed the previous chapter and just read it, now I'd bet the odds are on the low end of her involvement in Hinako's misfortune.

 

[raineight]

Well she’s immortal spending a couple hundred years underwater and breaking the chain is nothing

But by the time she got out, Hinako would be safely dead, unless she eats mermaid flesh too.