I wonder if the reason some translations (like this one) are hard to understand despite relatively few errors might be because Japan is a high context culture where people speak vaguely and indirectly and expect others to read between the lines, while (most?) English countries are low context and we expect people to explain themselves/connect the dots for us a lot more.
If a translation doesn't also translate the low context to high context then we'll struggle to understand what's going on even if the English translation is technically correct since we're not used to "reading the room". Certainly the Japanese idioms used here don't make much sense to us non-Japanese.
Well, regardless of the reason for our difficulty in understanding the chapter I'd still like to thank the translation team for making it possible to read this series at all.
In order to make a proper translation you need to understand what is being said and put yourself in the eyes of a reader that isn't well equipped to comprehend the nuances without guidance (source: 5 years of experience as a freelancer translator).
This type of translation reeks of poor coordination. Likely, whoever worked on the translation was only given the extracted text to work on, so they are missing the images that complement the scene. That would also explain why we see girls being called "he" or "them", since whoever is doing the translation hasn't been provided with the context necessary to utilize the proper pronouns.
Also likely that those pronouns were left as placeholders, so whoever was supposed to typeset would have to correct them accordingly, but no since happened. You can also see that some speech bubbles are left empty or the dialogue seems to have been switched up. That means whoever is responsible for quality control is also not doing their job properly.
Whenever I worked on translations in the past, I always made sure to contact my clients to confirm stuff I wasn't sure about and to inform of necessary changes I had to make to fit dialogue box limitations or untranslatable terms, but this type of zeal doesn't seem to be present in this group. Moreover, the people involved don't even seem to care about making the English sentences make sense or be cohesive with each other from time to time, so maybe the problem is even more fundamental than methodical.