I wholeheartedly agree with your wanting to get the continuity correct from go to whoa. From what I see of your translation corrections, what I had previously put down to being the Japanese 'vagueness' when it comes to the subject matter or the 'who' that is being talked about, now reads much more clearly. Good work!
The tank quality is appreciated even though the page files are now huge! Screen tones have gone from pixilated to flat (no idea if this is the correct terminology but it sort of sounds right) which is much more pleasing to look at, although I wouldn't have thought the style of drawing demanded such improved attention to detail. Is this the difference between magazine and tank printing quality or differences in the initial scans?