Yeah... sorry about that, give it some proof reading but its still a bit clunky at times
If you have any specific parts lmk and will fix
I don't know the original source, but page 23 sounds clunky, specifically "If I can't calm your anger, won't I end up getting killed?"
I assume this is the elf and dragon speaking to each other about the sacrifice, where the dragon wants to return her, the elf is saying it's impossible, and the dragon clarifying he's not angry. The sacrifice doesn't have language yet, so she can't speak from her perspective yet. Should it be "If
she can't calm your anger, won't
she end up getting killed?" as the elf is saying that particular bit? Or am I misunderstanding this exchange?