Choose Your Own Adventure: Professional Hitwoman

[PantsMan]

This thread is dedicated to the most highly respected of all writing mediums: the forum-based, collaborative CYOA.

Choices are selected by majority vote through your preferences; just post which option you want to support in the replies. For [Write-in] options, you'll be in charge of writing (and voting) for an appropriate response. If a tie isn't broken for a length of time, I'll just pick whichever answer I like most, or combine the two. As you can imagine, I'll mostly be keeping things fairly simple while flying by the seat of my pants here.

The plot so far, to quickly catch up with everything you need to know to participate:

Spoiler

Our heroine Eiko, self-professed "adorable star of the hitman world" and a master of acting and poisons, has been roped into being accompanied by a strange child as a condition for carrying out a lucrative series of hits.

At the moment, she is preparing for the first of the job's hits: taking out an entire yakuza group currently holed up in their headquarters.

*****

You sit in the small, inner-city park, bundled up in one too many layers of coats. You occasionally glance down at the time displayed on the old, disposable flip-phone you are clutching tightly. Depending on the call you are due to soon receive, tonight someone may have to die, and you'll be all the richer for it.

You are Eiko, the adorable (self-proclaimed) star (self-proclaimed) of the hitman world. Of course, you are no faceless assassin or two-bit hired gun: in a business as illegal and competitive as killing people by request, where avenues for personal advertisement are not exactly available, you'd be surprised by the degree of showmanship required to be successful in it. It is important to develop a unique identity to stand out to the crowd and draw in lucrative clients and patrons, be it specializing in certain types of jobs or even just simple notoriety.

With that being said, what is the personal style you have become renown for over the years?

A) The best part of killing people from up close is the variety: dagger, lead pipe, monkey wrench, rope, candlestick, your bare fists... The possibilities are endless!
B) The classic: from a cowardly but safe, safe distance. Also, surprisingly expensive to maintain properly.
C) Let the brutes keep their messy ways of killing for themselves. Acting, infiltration, forgery and "seduction" are your weapons of choice. The poison helps, though.
D) Killing people is for murderers, and you are no murderer. You just drive them to and especially away from the scene, and sometimes have lunch together.

 

[Thoraxe41]

C) Death by Erotic SnuSnu

 

[BlackGeneral]

C.
Seduce your victim
Break his heart into pieces
Let him kill himself

 

[EOTFOFYL]

C)
The methods varied,
only one thing is constant,
hidden calling cards.

 

[AfterMidnightMoon]

A. Rip and tear.

 

[PantsMan]

C) Let the brutes keep their messy ways of killing for themselves. Acting, infiltration, forgery and "seduction" are your weapons of choice. The poison helps, though.

Spoiler

You always were a girl who reached for the stars, only to come crashing down to Earth head-first. At 16, you dreamed of being a world-famous idol. Three years of loyally serving as a department store mascot later, you decided to go for the more realistic goal of being an actress. Admittedly, those expensive acting lessons came in handy at the call center you eventually ended up working in. Even more modest goals like "teacher" or "manzai comedian" inevitably became "janitor" and "street magician". After numerous trials and even more crushed dreams, you decided to settle for aiming to be a humble but, at the very least, happy housewife. Next thing you knew, you were killing people for money, and with no boyfriend in sight for well over five years.

You shudder at both the recollections and the cold winter air. Suddenly, a good ten minutes before the pre-established time, the old phone begins to buzz in your hand. You wordlessly bring it to your ear, waiting for the caller to identify themself. There is a second of delay on their end before you hear...

A) The familiar, husky yet feminine voice of an old friend.
B) The low growl of a middle-aged man. One who is used to giving orders and having them done without question, by the sound of it.
C) An excitable, chirpy voice. Likely belonging to either an overly cutesy young girl or an outright child.

 

[EOTFOFYL]

D)

A synthetic voice,
remaining anonymous
the caller blathers.

 

[BlackGeneral]

B. Life is suffering.

 

[krossite]

A) The familiar, husky yet feminine voice of an old friend.

Let's start off with some "favor" for an old friend.

 

[EOTFOFYL]

Ok, you know what?
screw the write-in option then,
I'm voting for A.

 

[Teddy]

C) Kids be monsters

 

[Meraviglios]

C for children are evil

 

[421cookies]

C The loli wishes for ara ara onee-chan

 

[PantsMan]

[C) An excitable, chirpy voice. Likely belonging to either an overly cutesy young girl or an outright child.

Spoiler

A voice, oozing with youthful joy and innocence, comes through at full blast from the other end of the call. "Mommy!"

You instantly hang up.

All right, calm down. you tell yourself, after the initial shock has passed. I don't remember having a kid... Did I forget? Is that something that even happens...? A lie, then? But why do they know this contact? What-

The buzzing of the phone stirs you from these feverish thoughts. You cautiously weigh for a moment whether this is some trap, or if it might be someone trying to track your current location or distract you. Looking around, though, both the playground and residential district around you are as dead quiet as could be. You'd easily notice if someone was spying at you right now with anything short of a military satellite. Finally, your curiosity gets the better of you, and you pick up the still-ringing phone.

"Sorry..." apologizes earnestly the child (a high-pitched boy? Or a boyish sounding girl?) "I was told that saying that would make you listen to my request." He/she clears his throat a little. "I'd like to have a chat over some instant coffee tomorrow at 11:00 am, at Cafe Ribery. You'll recognize me pretty easily: I'm very, very short, and wear my hair with a butterfly pin. My dad will be offering." The kid pauses, presumably to catch her breath. They probably memorized the whole thing, word for word. "After that, would you like to have lunch with us? There's a Thai place nearby, but I don't like spicy food. Lau's Chinese Buffet, otherwise?"

You say nothing, but stay on the line. The child, snapping back to her more joyful demeanor, concludes: "Umm... Thank you very much! Please be there! *click* "

You pull out an old map, identify the three locations listed, then triangulate to their center. A family restaurant downtown: where the hit is to take place. You pinch the bridge of your nose, letting out a long sigh; it was a perfectly formulated request: tomorrow at 11 you are to kill the person identified with an ingested, fast-acting poison, then remove the body from the scene. Advance and an additional insurance payment arrangements made through a middle man you trust, the so-called "Dad". You receive a confirmation of the received payment from the latter shortly thereafter: an astronomic sum, almost a good double of what you'd normally get for this kind of job.

Still, the whole matter stinks to you: if the child's just there to deliver the message, then your actual customer is up to something suspicious enough that they don't want you to hear their voice. Major red flag. If the kid is instead actually more deeply involved with the hit, then you don't want to know why, or how they got the contact and money required. Another message from "Dad" confirms the customer's insurance is big enough for this to likely not be just someone trying to do you in.

Either way, the whole thing stinks enough to require some "insurance" of your own. Aside from the basics like scouting out the area before and securing an escape route, you're going to need an ace up your sleeve...

A) Maybe you'll pull in a few favours and give that "old friend" a call. Two hitmen are better than one.
B) Shortie or not, you're going in armed to the teeth for this one. With a proper concealed weapon and a few of your rarer chemicals on you, it'll take a whole SWAT team to stop you if you need to run.
C) Tweak the hit's details: you'll be taking out the established target, sure, but at a different location, time and, most importantly, on your own terms.
D) While your customer shouldn't know your appearance, a disguise should make the possibility of that happening absolutely zero.
E) Why bother? A customer's a customer; being overtly suspicious isn't going to do anything but sour your reputation. If things go awry, you're good enough to get out of it unscathed regardless.
F) [Write-in a way to ensure your safety at the hit tomorrow, in case of foul play]

 

[KINGJOE]

B
For beanos

 

[krossite]

B for boobies

Spoiler

not A,Let's save "favor" for an actual, clear threat.

Not C,a client's specification should be respect, or reputation could take a hit.

Not D, the client would know our specialty, and be on the lookout for that.

Not E,this is appropriately suspicious, carelessness wouldn't keep hitmen alive for long.

B, because it still play to our specialy while keep more options to get away open than disguise that'd be gone once exposed.

 

[Teddy]

E) Assassination is a service industry, customer is king.

If they didn't read the Magna Carte though, ask for severance pay; right before you sever them.

 

[Anoon2323]

Write-in: Set up a diversion beforehand that can be remotely activated.

For example: fire alarm/sprinklers, circuit-breaker flipper, smoke-grenade in the kitchen to simulate fire, fake gunshots, etc

 

[Jordan_Weeberson]

E. Even if it turns bad, we can still improvise.

 

[PantsMan]

Spoiler

*******

The hands on your watch change to 11:00. As far as cheap family restaurants go, this one is unusually spacious for just being located on the ground floor. No traces of cigarette smoke on the walls, either. And large, plastic-bound menus without any noticeable stains on them? Truly this place must be high class. You give a slight nod of approval that only someone who has experienced the absolute worst of the industry can afford.

While you were torn as to whether come with your full loadout or settle for a professional, customer-conscious bare minimum, you decided to take the middle ground: a single, specially-selected poison, an easily concealed siringe and a vial containing a powerful narcotic. The latter item in this case is your "insurance": while it can knock someone out in a matter of minutes if ingested or injected, it can also be exposed to outside air to release a white cloud of numbing vapours. Of course, as with most of your own poisons, you have built a considerable resistance to the effects yourself.

You scan the interior of the restaurant, keeping your eyes peeled for the telltale hairpin. You finally spot it... On the head of a young girl, no older than 10. Sitting by herself in a small booth at the far end of the restaurant, she appears to be unaccompanied. Anxiously swinging her feet under the seat she is sitting on, her gaze travels from the other restaurants' patrons to the cup of juice that sits in front of her, from which she occasionally dares to take a timid sip. Between the yukata she is wearing and the expensive-looking hairpin, she paints an odd picture in the otherwise unassuming joint.

Time to get to work.

A) The direct approach: walk in through the front door, sit at her table, inject her with a hefty dose of neurotoxin, then waltz right out with the body and a good excuse.
B) Good thing you've already been sitting inside the restaurant for almost an hour ahead of schedule. You'll have plenty of good opportunities to slip past her table while going to get free refills or, more likely, on your trips to the toilet.
C) Getting your hands on one of the waitress uniforms would give you all the undisputed authority of a minimum-wage part timer, as well as access to the kitchen.
D) Whoa now! "Customer is king" and all that, but killing a little girl definitely isn't the the kind of job you'd like to be associated with in the future. Leave; the deal's off.
E) [Write-in]