Do ya'll need a native English PR?
You guys do a bunch of series that I enjoy.. but reading what's put out makes me feel like I'm having a stroke..
There are the obvious things that people have brought up already, but P7 ".. And congratulate on your victory" is one that could have easily been spotted... Congratulations or even shortening it to Congrats would have made it flow so much better. In addition, same page.. "It's been forever since I feel so alive" could be changed from "I feel" to "I've felt" or "I have felt."
Again, just minor things, but having to re-read a bubble 2-3x to try to better understand the meaning throws off the whole flow of reading.