I think the translation accuracy was okay except for some minor errors, but the most glaring one was on page 19 where it said あたった (atatta) which should be "it's touching" or "it touched" but was translated as "I'm I-." On a positive note, I was pleasantly surprised that you knew the "G" in "Gのようで" (pg 11) was short for gokiburi. A lot of first time TLers might not have realized the meaning. But you messed up the speech bubble just before that part when you wrote "if you one" when it should have been, "if you see one."
The most problematic issue is the format. Capitalizing the first letter of nearly every word is not a correct way to write English. Either do all caps with Wild Words (the typical way) or only capitalize the words which ought to be capitalized (e.g. first word of a sentence, proper nouns, etc).
Also, the last panel used the wrong "your." It should have been, "Since you're her classmate, give her my best regards." And a mistake right after that is the missing apostrophe in "we're classmates."
There were similar grammatical issues throughout the chapter, but I won't list them all here.
@Zero00_X