Can you really say you love them? I mean you.
What does it even mean pressuring her
? If she likes him she will welcome it. From what I gather she rejects almost any advances from him to begin with. She is obviously not attracted to him (ok some minimal level exists but far from where it should be). It cannot be explained by being shy. Shyness isnt strong enough to overcome true emotions.
You talked about having a belief regarding saying no to premarital intimacy. Well guess what. The world does not turn around one person. If you live in a relationship that is destined to go to marriage, your beliefs will constantly be challenged. More often than you wish to admit to yourself you may have to back off too. What is the value of marriage? Lets say he waited her and married her. Then next day filled for divorce. Have fun.
That's not the point.
The point is that was a belief she had and an important one to her.
And if that really is important to her, he should give that respect.
She's going to be his anyways. Does he need to rush her??? And she was attracted to him. That was just her value.
Yes, the WORLD doesn't revolve around one person. But this is not about the entire world. This is about THEM.
And HE needs to show respect for her beliefs.
If he isn't willing to even give that kind of respect to her... can he be trusted???
It's not about purity or stuff like that (I'm not against premarital sex or sh*t like that), it's for this specific case where I feel it's wrong.
He's trying to make himself pitiful and make her lower the guard...
It's basically a lack of respect for her beliefs.
Yes, beliefs will be challenged. But that doesn't mean he shouldn't respect her beliefs.
If she goes too far for no sex.. maybe... but she's just wanting to wait till marriage.
If she asked for that, shouldn't he respect that???
Why is asking for respect such a bad thing???
And your last point makes no sense. What does him getting a divorce have to do with anything??? This is about respecting your partner and valuing them.
If having sex is more important to you then respecting your partner's boundaries and values... then that's not a good relationship.
If she just naturally changed those values on her own. Fine. But he's trying to change those values forcefully for a bit earlier sex....
THAT is what I find scummy. He's not even that far from marriage with her. He can't wait that little bit of time for her???