I have 60 cents to last me the next 12 days until payday. My last paycheck was 600 less than rent/utilities. Which means in total I have 400 a month for food, gas, and anything else I need.
I suck at job interviews and fail the 2nd/3rd interview constantly. Scheduling interviews is hard bc I work 9 to 5 and am in costco, no free time during hours besides breaks. I am an IT person and need to get back in my field....
Only really ever had 1 friend due to parent's refusal to give me any privacy starting in 5th grade and hardly remember how to talk to anyone since they would inturrupt me, talk for me, and then punish me for what they said in front of everyone. Couldn't get a job until I escaped since I was required to live by their schedule and attend all their events I was told about with 10 minutes notice. Escape only occured bc my friend finally contacted me and helped rebuild my energy and connect with cousins to plan my escape and get out without them knowing. I should also mention I didn't have my own car
Said friend is no longer here to give me energy, I am drained, its a bit much to deal with when you have your own life and aare the only support. Went to a therapy place and made a couple friends but one stopped talking after leaving and the other droped me since I called in a wellness check when she claimed to have done something to end her life a second time (I took the first one as just a manner of expression of her emotional state and just gave her all the attention I could until I learned she was hospitalized the next day). Sorry, I can't ignore you saying you are in the middle of an active suicide attempt when you have a history of that and I care about you. I'd show up myself if we were not half a day away from each other
Drained, Broke, Am barely making rent in spite of not living in any way and leaving ac between 76 and 80F, out of people to ask for help, don't have people my age in my department at my job, am working in a job I am less suited for (I have years of system administration experience, I just wasn't paid for it bc family business)... and out of support. Stuck.... Just so stuck. Better than being stuck with parent's but I really want to start living my life not be stuck like this....