Shin'yuu no Furin Aite wa, Otto deshita - Vol. 3 Ch. 20

[hitohito1]

There is also a huge pervasive mentality in Japan (and other countries to an extent of course), though especially among Japanese married men, that cheating is permissible. I was actually trying to gather some of this data to present in a future tl note if I have the time but yeah there's a lot of stuff here that's cultural.

 

[Nosebleed]

This is a funny video but far too cherry picked to be worth much of substance. Going to Shibuya (the Las Vegas of Tokyo) and interviewing unmarried women in their 20s and 30s it's no surprise you get very skewed results. It's very important to get data from a wider age range, relationship status, and geographical distribution. Anonymity also plays a factor, as not everyone is comfortable on camera, particularly to discuss such a topic.

Actual data from studies and polls usually show that, in marriages, it's more likely for men to cheat compared to women. Lower estimates put it at around a 20% rate, while higher estimates can cross the 50% range. That big margin shows how complicated this type of data is to gather in and of itself. For married women the rate seems to hover between 10% and 30%. This is based on my own cross-referencing work between several sites and polls, but I'm still not happy with my findings and am trying to find more reliable estimates.

A lot of this data is primarily skewed by what people even view as cheating as well. For example, a lot of folks do not consider using paid sex services as cheating, whether they're men or women. There's also what counts as cheating in terms of what you do with another person, some say a kiss is cheating, some say only sex is cheating, etc. (source)

Though one major difference between men and women is the reason for cheating. From one poll I saw, most married women who have cheated tend to give "marriage problems" as their primary reason (poll I say put it as high as 45% of the answers), while for men the reasons are more spread out, ranging from daily stress, to marriage problems, to lack of intimacy in the bedroom, to finding someone more attractive. (source)

Then there's actual views on is cheating okay or not.

One of the polls I found (500 people sample size) had the following data
For married men:
6.2% said cheating is completely okay
30% said cheating is okay as long as it doesn't get found out
38% said cheating is not okay, but it can't be helped that it happens
26.9% said cheating is never okay

For married women
0.8% said cheating is completely okay
9.4% said cheating is okay as long as it doesn't get found out
31.5% said cheating is not okay, but it can't be helped that it happens
58.3% said cheating is never okay.

So from this we can conclude there is a massive gap in how married men and women perceive how okay it is to cheat, and also that there is at least sizeable chunk of people who, despite condemning cheating, still view it as "it is what it is."

There's also data distinction between unmarried and married men/women but for the purposes of this story I was trying to focus primarily on married couples.

And again these are just some preliminary numbers I dug up online, it's not very deep research and I don't want to present it as such. I'll only write a tl note on it if I can have a higher degree of confidence in the data.

 

[AcidVlad]

The author's word about decay of the fresh and sharpness of the spirit is painfu
l

 

[EchoGirl]

tho, i wonder how good quality their smartphones are to record a convo, one time i recorded something inside and all i heard was the wind overpowering things even ifi wasn't moving (well i guess they're inside and the cafe? isn't crowded /next to each other but still)

Why Rei? As in him as a person as he doesn’t seem like the best husband. But also why Rei as in, why your friends husband? Does she even see Mahoro as an actual friend? And why cheat? Did Rio’s husband cheat? Or does he neglect her and she considers that enough reason as to cheat? Remember that as explained in a previous chapter, getting divorced is actually quite hard in Japan, especially if your partner doesn’t want to divorce and they didn’t do anything ‘wrong’ in the marriage. I do think that Japans strict rules for divorce are a contributing factor to people cheating amongst many other things.

I mean if it's just cheating in a hotel/hook up, it's not like she has to deal with how the wife/mc at home has to deal with him not helping with chores or being considerate versus like the cheater just being 'better' when they're with the mistress/affair partner

I'm curious if Rio's husband actually exists now.

Other than far away/getting married in a diff country/far away honeymoon i would've assumed they would've attended the wedding

Oof author note is too relatable

And that wine guy is awkward timing imagine if he was her affair partner, tho feels like they would've had intense looks if not wait for ppl to stop talking bc they were clearly in the middle of a convo

(tho i wonder if they charge for refills otherwise they could just silently refill without asking but i guess that'd be awkward if they didn't want it)

 

[Jatopian]

Funny that MC is focused on her appearance as a possible impetus for the cheating. I suppose it's because hubby used appearance insults to shut down the friend who tried to tempt him into cheating, but appearance is not MC's only flaw.

 

[EchoGirl]

Funny that MC is focused on her appearance as a possible impetus for the cheating. I suppose it's because hubby used appearance insults to shut down the friend who tried to tempt him into cheating, but appearance is not MC's only flaw.

"Emotional" cheating is a thing but usually affairs are associated with sleazy older men hooking up with younger attractive women, tho i guess it depends , reason might change as you're older b/c feels like you wouldn't bother to get married or so versus getting it 'out of your system' before committing but sucky ppl are that tempted

Vaguely remember some online anecdotes that are like "parents got divorced and dad started hooking up with someone around my age/barely five years older than me" or so XP

 

[jrocker]

I think Rio's marriage clearly has a problem and she bottled it up by pretending its perfect. It made her feel unfulfilled so she wanted to cheat to feel like she has the power somewhere. Whether its with Rei is a different matter but I think she is cheating on her husband.

It also goes why if her husband was cheating on her she would feel lost since she doesn't have anything without him. The cafe and everything are from him not her hard work.